Friday, February 25, 2011

Life Interrupted


The manager of the hotel I am staying at came knocking on my screen door last night (Tuesday) at 3:00 a.m. David's dad was on the phone.

Davids mother has left us, it happened very suddenly and unexpectedly. We all know that our loved ones will leave, but we are never, ever ready for it.

Margaret was like a mother to me too, in fact I called her Mum. I have known her since I was 17 years old, that's a very long time.

She welcomed me into her family with open arms, never judging, never critical. I was the daughter she always wanted, yet never had until I met David. She spoiled me rotten! In fact, she gave me a key to her house, not David and said "If you two ever divorce, Kristy can come home, but not you David! ha ha

You really couldn't want a better mother in law.

Its very hard being in another country, I was able to change our flight, but we cannot leave until Thursday, one more day later. Paradise has suddenly become prison.

Through the tears and frustration we talked all day on Wednesday. We sat in the sun, drank way too much wine and walked over to have lunch at the restaurant next door. I sat looking at the ocean, sipping white wine and eating lobster with garlic. Even in sorrow I tell the guy to leave out the butter.
He senses something is not right, he fills my glass "on the house" and softly walks away. 

I emailed a friend who lives across the street from my in-laws, I met her through my blog. I ask if she will check on my Dad, Alicia wonderfully goes to spend time with him. She assures me she will check on him until we can get there, and her husband, Solomon will go see him when he returns from work in the evening, it is a great comfort to know there are others you can count on.

Actually being here another day, stranded has allowed us some time to come to terms with Mum's sudden death, to relate to one another, to talk our way through our own fears and pains. When my mother died 2 years ago, also in February, I had been caring for her with hospice, we talked daily about her fears of dying, my fears of her dying, our intertwined lives. It was not the same with Mum, we never got that chance.

I was always fortunate to have two mothers, and now I have memories only. But very good memories that I can cherish forever.

I love you Mum.