Peace

Peace, what makes you feel at peace? I have found that I am a creature of habit, oh this is not a new revelation, but it becomes more and more evident every day. I thrive on structure, on routine, on set ways of doing things.

Don't get me wrong, I love surprise and I enjoy being spontaneous, but I am at my best when everything goes along as planned and when I am in control.

I have realized that I cannot always be in control, and that is OK, I need to learn to accept that. A long time ago I stopped worrying about things that I couldn't control, that only causes frustration and stress. If you cannot control or change it, is there any point in worrying about it? NO.

This really hit home when I was sick. As I write this, it has been 29 days since I became ill. I am definitely getting better, I think I shall be right as rain in only a few more days. I have actually gone the last three days with only a slight headache when I wake up, and once in the evening. They have been extremely mild and I am still on medication, so it will be a thing of the past soon.

During my illness I would get many people asking what was wrong? Why don't they have a definitive answer? This is crazy, it's going on so long. They were all very concerned, and I love them all for caring, but I just wasn't that worried. I mean, I was sick, and seeing two doctors, what good would it do me to worry about it? So I didn't.

But I found myself worrying about not being able to lift weights, this walking stuff is for the birds! I tried to tell myself that I shouldn't worry as it was out of my control, what good would it to for my health to add additional stress? So I grew to enjoy my "short" 5 mile walks, it was actually very peaceful and relaxing. Especially early in the morning when no one is awake yet. I would listen to pod casts from the "Natural Bodybuilding Radio" channel, and got lots of great tips and ideas.

Now, I am back to my regular schedule. I am up at 4, off to the gym, then to work, I love all of it. This weekend I prepared a huge batch of vegetables for lunches and spent 2 1/2 hours in the gym on Saturday morning, my favorite thing to do, and that didn't even include a steam or shower! I am lifting, and lifting heavy. I feel good, I feel at peace again.